Napaland

Saturday June 12th 2004 8:20 P.M.

Napaland

Hiya Matt::
How's life treating you? As for me I am bored to death.. I have been watching TV for a couple of hours and it hasn't gotten any better. Guess network TV programs don't mature with age as fine wine..

Speaking of wine, I was in San Francisco last week on my vacation and as expected we went to the famous Napa & Sonoma valleys to see their famous vineyards. Now is Homer a wine connoisseur? We all know that he likes his six pack but really I haven't seen him drinking wine. The only time I saw him drinking wine is the episode in which he once goes to a Parisian restaurant wearing a stupid cap which the French usually wear and exclaims something like this.. 'Marge, I like it here. I can eat and drink all I want and be a perfect slob, but I am not criticized for now I am GOURMAND". Great going dude!!

So now back to America's answer to French Champagne --> Napa and Sonoma valleys. Now we all know that if you go there you have to take a wine tour at one of the vineyards. Now my question is why all vineyards have their own individual wine tours. Do they really have something which distinguishes them from their neighbors? Apart from their individual small historical background (who bought from whom in which year and what price), winemaking from one vineyard does not differ much from the other. I know there are lots of scientific details but the vanilla version given to the common people goes like this..

1. Plant the vines. Remember to have good stock so that you get a good quality crop once the vines start bearing grapes.
2. When the grapes are mature, give a call to the border authorities to allow in a couple of cheap mexican labor to hand pick those grapes. You wouldn't want to get your hands dirty, would you? And machines are not that useful as they can't distinguish between good and bad clusters. Also you can charge a premium price when you say that the grape's been handpicked. Personal touch eh..
3. Once they have been picked take them to the processing plant. Remove all stalks and other foreign material.
4. Crush the grapes. If you want white wine remove the skins.
5. Put it in steel containers with yeast at a very low temperature and let time and nature do their magic.
6. After fermentation store them in the wooden barrels to mature.
7. After maturation for a couple of years, blend it, bottle it and you are on your way..

So the question I have for these vineyard owners is this. Why can't you guys create a common welcome center somewhere in your respective valleys where you have a common tour. Hell you can even charge a common sum say $20 for that and get even richer. People will pay that amount to get the common first hand experience without experiencing the agony of thinking that they missed out on a better tour in some other vineyard. You can have fine dining, wine tasting, designer boutique shops and a kids adventure dome/petting zoo. You see an entire package for a family get together.

Individual wineries can still continue to have their specialized tours and gourmet dining/wine tasting for the discerning connoisseur and remember it is fashionable to be a connoisseur :-).